Here were four twentysomething women who hardly knew each other, already talking about the eventuality of marriage and apparently radical possibility that we would ever commit our lives to someone unlike us.This conversation seemed very “un-Millennial”–as a whole, our generation is marrying later, becoming more secular, and embracing different cultures more than any of our predecessors.
Debates about intermarriage, or marriage outside of the faith, are common in the Jewish community, but her question still struck me as remarkable.And because Christians aren’t obligated to follow most Jewish precepts, they are free to examine Jewish wisdom, extract what speaks to them, and make it their own.Judaism has a radical approach to handling relationships that works brilliantly (it certainly did for my husband and I! While Christians needn't follow all of these guidelines, they can still benefit tremendously.When you marry the right person, that person will enourage you to be the best you can be. You might be attracted to someone of the same gender.The more fully you develop who you are, the more likely it is that you will attract a mate who will appreciate you. But those people can never be your true soulmates, the one that G-d chose for you before you were born. This is Torah law and the wisdom of the Jewish mystical tradition as it has been handed down for thousands of years. Successful marriages are focused on the things both partners have in common.